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Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 137: Have you ever woken up in the morning and not remembered what you did the night before?

July 29th, 2006 (11:57 am)

No, because I have enough people in my life who would tell me of every detail and in triplicate no less because they feel the need to gossip and slander. You would think that in his changing of the world, Thiede would have ensured that little trait was erased from the gene pool but that sadly was left in.

However, I’m feeling a weird streak of late in which I would like to have one of those days preferably with Cal.

That is if I could find him instead of having to gaze into the mournful glare of Rue.

There’s another reason for wanting to drink into that state of not remembering, the fact that my Tigrina is a whinging fishwife who alternates between mournful gazes and glaring at me.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 140

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

136 'What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.' Do you agree or disagree? Why?

July 29th, 2006 (11:41 am)

I neither agree nor disagree. With my life and the way that it has been led to this point, I have lost everything and gained everything and I feel neither dead nor stronger. I feel strangely just at peace.

It’s like when you float in the water, you don’t go forward nor backwards but are just held up.

Everything to that moment is supporting you as you go about your business.

All that you can do with the knowledge you’ve gained is to make sure that you do not end up smashed on the rocks of life.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 107

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 134: What is the lamest excuse you've ever given for something you've done?

July 15th, 2006 (06:05 pm)

Publicly since I became Tigron, I’m not allowed to make excuses lame or otherwise as it sets a terribly bad example, however there’s always the private and for those moments there are a ton of lame excuses.

That Rue reminds me of Cal and I have to punish him because he’s not Cal. That’s the top of the list of which I keep in my head and remind myself of on a daily basis, that is rather when I have the luxury of being by myself and not being with Thiede made me become.

I know that nothing is left to fate, there are those that would say Thiede is fate but I can’t make excuses any more. Tigron means that I lead and so my childhood reasoning for those things I do must end.

But the first excuse is the one that still sits in my head.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 158

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 133: “If”

July 3rd, 2006 (11:07 pm)

Pell stood leaning against the wall, his feet bare and his arms crossed, fingers testing and playing with the fine silks of his robe, a thin shield against the night air as he listened to the rainstorm that raged on the other side of the palace walls.

It reminded him of the night that he had watched Cal commit Grissecom for the first time, the strength and beauty of it and he came away from the wall as the room was lit by the lightning behind him and he looked as if seeing for the first time.

And in a way he was, for he began to wonder about how his life had been changed and if it was for the better by the figure on horseback long before.

He wondered if he truly understood how much he owed and it was as if he could see inside his beloved’s head as he sat astride the horse.

“If I go left … or if I go right.”

It was interesting to him to think on what could have been if Cal had of turned right and went further down the road instead of left and to him.

But the lightshow resumed again and thinking of deep thoughts such as those were soon banished as he felt himself settle into peace.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 233

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 132: What Makes You Angriest

June 24th, 2006 (04:14 pm)

Not a what, but a who.

Yes that’s right, a who and the who is my beloved Tigrina if I can manage to type that without a mental brain cramp due to the anger in my system for being forced to blood bond with someone that I didn’t want to be bonded to.

I know that it was the mistakes that I made under the loving guidance by Thiede that brought him into the position of my consort, but dear aghama above, the urges to lash out are usually brought out in me by Rue and that’s my biggest aggravation and biggest regret.

For when I do lash out, its because that he is not Cal, yes they have the same hair color but he isn’t my chosen, he wasn’t who was meant for me. Cal was, it was our fault that we never had the sense to stand up for it much less think to fight for it.

And it is wrong to be this angry towards the har who hosted my harling, my heir .. but I cannot help it.

It wasn’t a what that makes me angriest, but a who.

One day I hope that I can change this feeling within me.


Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 215

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 129: When I awoke the next morning...

June 12th, 2006 (09:58 pm)

I found myself wondering what I would have been like if I had not become Tigron, would I still be the same farm boy that Cal found that day. Would I still be that close minded, would I have had any adventures at all.

Would I have been happy still on the farm, surrounded by family and loved ones? Would they be still so vivid in my mind instead of fading like paintings on the surrounding walls.

I nestled into silken sheets, feeling the breeze coming in from the open balcony doors, hearing the staff beginning their duties and I studied the canopy of the bed.

It would not be the first time I had this thought, but for this moment, when I awoke, I was happy with how my life had gone.

For I knew that my life truly was never … had never been that one thing I feared most.

Boring.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 163

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 128: What does "comfort" mean to you?

June 12th, 2006 (09:48 pm)

Comfort in my life means only one thing, one person … Cal.

He was with me from the first day of my becoming Har, he was my first and some would say only love. He knows how to handle me as much as I know how to deal with his moods and his whims where others are antsy and scared to be near him for being Cal.

Which amuses me for I still see him on his pony.

His arms are the ones who I find the true meaning of comfort, to forget that I am the Tigron, who Rue sends me to when I am being impossible.

What does comfort mean to me?

Comfort means that I am able to cope with who I was made to be by someone’s whimsy, because I know that if I hadn’t been blessed by being given Cal back, I would have driven Rue and myself insane if we hadn’t already started by the time that I saw the figure I had known since he had gamboled his way on his pony long before.

Comfort for me has always been Cal.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 198

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 127: Describe a chance encounter that changed your life.

June 12th, 2006 (09:33 pm)

It was overcast, the air clammy and heavy … like the dampness of our sheets in the night when we went to bed wet from the bath. The knives in my hands anchoring me as I watched him riding his pony, the very one I learnt later that he had stolen.

I thought he was an illusion, a fevered dream or a spirit conjured by the heat that radiated from the ground as if it was the magician personified. It was my destiny in the most vivid colors of the clothes Cal wore.

I thought then that it was chance, the way that one likes the way that an apple looks in their hand, the way that their liquor looks in the glass by firelight. Just something that appealed.

I never knew then that my life from the moment I took Cal’s hand was destined, that there was another pulling the strings on my marionette.

Nothing in my life from that day was chance.

But Cal definitely in all his form, changed my life.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 184

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 125: Who was "the one that got away"

June 12th, 2006 (09:24 pm)

That is easy, there are two that could classify as the one who got away.

There was the one who got away because he was not Cal, the one who would have been if not for the fact that the other had been everything to me, my first.

There was the other who was as mercurial as a summer’s storm, as dazzling as the sun on winter’s snow. The one who in my eyes defined passion in all its diamond brightness, the one who should have been with me from day one, my Cal, the one who got away only to be given back to me when I had lost all hope of having him.

There was Rue, who was spice and music, who hosted my harling, who was as much a gem as Cal, but who I ruined in the clouded sightlessness that was wrapped around me like the silk sheets that I slept in, but thanks to Cal .. thanks to Cal, I was able to salvage the relationship we tried to damage with the sharpest of words.

I was lucky however in that I somehow managed to not have to suffer my losses for in the end, I managed to keep them both. My Tigrina and My Tigron.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 221

Pellaz Cevarro Pellaz har Aralis [userpic]

Topic 123: Perception: Generally speaking, how do you think others perceive you?

June 12th, 2006 (09:08 pm)

Like an iceberg, few really knowing what I am really like, the farm boy that saw stars when I laid eyes on Cal.

Distant and the subject of more myths and dreams than one of those mystical dreamcatchers that the ancients used to make to soothe the infants in their midst, a boogeyman for harlings that misbehave, a rule to be used as harshly as one would use a knife between the ribs of those who do not believe.

There are those who do know me, those who have been tempered by the years of my rule, those who have seen me honeyed sweet and as intoxicating as one of those sugared candies that are at hand in the middle of the meeting tables in council.

I must admit that now over time, I haven’t made things easy .. allowed them to see me.

That is an image that I would show to only one person.

He who is my other half, my other soul … the one who could never be Tigrina

But he could be my co-Tigron.

Character: Pellaz
Fandom: Wraeththu books (Misc Books)
Word Count: 189

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